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Greendale Community College

Greendale Community College    Greendalelogo
Purpose : Institution of higher learning — PHOTO ICON Gallery —Location details
First appearance: Pilot

Employees: Greendale faculty and staff
Visitors: Students, faculty and administration


“
You're Already Accepted!
”
Dr. Patrick Isakson

Greendale Est.1974 poster
Greendale poster.
Greendale Community College (GCC) is an open-admissions college located Greendale County, Colorado. Founded back in 1974 by Russell Borchert, it is best known for having amongst its alumni the character actor Luis Guzman. While not as prestigious an academic institution as its rival City College, it's an affordable school which has over 80 different fields of study. The current Dean is Craig Pelton and its mascot is the "Greendale Human Being". The school's first appearance was in the Season One episode Pilot and has since served as the primary setting for the series.

About[]

History[]


Greendale will blow your mind and your body! Won't you get to know us better?

Patrick Isakson, "The 5 As"

The land upon which Greendale Community College would eventually be built was originally the site of an animal rendering plant [1]. In 1974, inventor Russell Borchert purchased the grounds and founded a technological institute known as the "Greendale Computery College". The school's first head administrator was Dean Pizzini who had to deal with a scandal the following year that almost shut down the college. This involved Borchert and his unnatural love for his computer science experiment. Borchert was believed to have died from a "computer virus" so Dean Pizzini sealed off Borchert's computer lab in case an actual contagion was involved. The city purchased the campus in the aftermath turning it into a traditional community college [2].

In 1977 the school finally got a roof and two years later in 1979 the Air Conditioning Repair school was established. The following decade in 1983 a student protest was held over the school's racially insensitive mascot at the time "Big Chief Drunky". In response the mascot would be renamed the "Sober Casinoman" only to be changed again sometime later to the "Greendale Grizzlies". In the 1990's Dean Bigley was in charge and his administration saw General Manuel Noriega being granted an honorary degree. During this time a memorable Greendale television commercial was filmed which would be used for nearly two decades.
The current administration under Dean Craig Pelton instituted several incentive programs to improve enrollment. A new mascot was created to represent a diverse student body called the "Greendale Human Being". The school logo was also changed in 2010 to a symbol representing the school as a crossroads. The long running commercial was finally updated with an appearance by character actor Luis Guzman who was an alumnus of the school. In 2013 Greendale was sued by a former graduate for not educating him properly and a grading scandal rocked the campus. Pelton put together a special committee that restored harmony and improved campus life.
Through their efforts the school was classified by an insurance appraiser as a valuable property asset. School board members Carl Bladt and Richie Countee made a deal with the Subway corporation to buy Greendale. However, the unexpected return of founder Russell Borchert, who still had ownership of the land, brought an end to the sale. The following year the cafeteria roof collapsing under the committee's watch led to the hiring of an efficiency consultant to assist them. Other important faculty hires included a new Law professor and I.T. department head. After another year spent fixing the school the consultant declared at the end of the 2015 semester that the committee's work was completed and Greendale was officially saved.

Mission[]

Greendale Community College makes available collegiate level education to adults of all ages, races, and creeds. Greendale prides itself in 5 categories which the school excels at:


  • Accessibility
  • Affordability
  • Air Conditioning
  • Awesome New Friends
  • A Lot of Classes
The Straight A's

Tuition[]

Greendale introduced the "No More Than 64" promise, which means students will never pay more than $64 per credit hour.

("Note': Frequent Flyer Miles are NOT an acceptable form of payment.)

Academics[]

Greendale offers over 80 different fields of study. Registration and classes are also offered online. Courses include:

Art[]

Business, Economics, Humanities, Law[]

  • Advanced Claims Denial [11]
  • Anthropology [12]
  • Baby Talk [13]
  • Cosmetology [14]
  • Criminology [15]
  • Education [16]
  • History [17]
  • History of Ice Cream [18]
  • History of the Irish Potato Famine [19]
  • Intro to Senselessness [20]
  • Law [21]
  • Marketing [22]
  • Opinions [23]
  • Physical Education [24]
  • Physical Education Education [25]
  • Political Science [26]
  • Pre-Menopausal Post-Feminist Experiential Marketing [27]
  • Spanish 101 [28]
  • Women's Studies [29]

Sciences, Technology, Engineering, Math[]

  • Accounting [30]
  • Advanced Advanced Decomposition [31]
  • Advanced Breath Holding [32]
  • Astronomy [33]
  • Biology [34]
  • Can I Fry That? [35]
  • Chemistry [36]
  • Computery Science [37]
  • Engineering [38]

Sports programs[]

Along with Academics, Greendale provides both individual and team sports programs. These include:


Specialized training[]

Greendale Air Conditioning Repair School[]

(See main article: Greendale Air Conditioning Repair School)

An annex to Greendale Community College, the Air Conditioning Repair School is not just a two year trade school but the latest chapter in the history of an A/C Repair fraternity that dates back to the time of the pharaohs. This society started off as lowly servants but eventually gained enough influence to become a secret power in the world. Written in the sacred texts of "The Air Conditioning Repair Manual" that was passed down from the society's original founders, its followers await the coming of a messiah known as "The Truest Repairman". Its first mention was in the Season One episode "Advanced Criminal Law". It made its official debut in the Season Three episode "Biology 101". GCC Air Conditioning Annex logo

Tour of the school[]

Greendale Community College campus map

Student Life[]

Clubs and Organizations[]

The following are student groups, clubs, and organizations at Greendale:

  • Acoustic Guitar Club
  • A/V Department
  • Beekeepers Club [57]
  • Campus Republicans
  • Chess Club [58]
  • Cheerleader Club [59]
  • Club Club [60]
  • Club Club Club [61]
  • Collegiate A Capella
  • Comedy Night Group
  • Culture Club [62]
  • Debate Team [63]
  • Delta Cubes [64]
  • Disco Club [65]
  • Drama Club [66]
  • Environmental Club [67]
  • Forensics Club
  • Geometry Club [68]
  • Glee Club [69]
  • Hat Club [70]
  • Ice-Breakers Club
  • Improv Now Group [71]
  • Intramural Sports
  • Karate Kid Club [72]
  • Marching Band [73]
  • Math Club [74]
  • Model United Nations [75]
  • Old Timey Photo Club [76]
  • Political Club [77]
  • Pre-Law Club [78]
  • Scrapbooking Club [79]
  • Student Government Association
  • Student Newspaper [80]
  • Sumo Wrestling Club
  • Trapeze Club [81]

Dances[]

Greendale has five official dances every school year. Anyone who manages to attend all the dances in a school year gets a special black t-shirt that says "All 5 Dances". The only dance confirmed to happen regularly is the "Transfer/Tranny Dance", to bid farewell to transferring students (all Greendale credits are transferable and there is a "Six Degrees of Preparation" plan). Several students are nominated (not necessarily transferring ones), and one is finally selected to be "Tranny Queen".

Other dances mentioned or shown are:

Annual Paintball[]

An annual game of Paintball Assassin is usually played near the end of every Spring semester to close out the school year. The 2010 prize was priority registration ("Modern Warfare"), the 2011 prize was $100,000 ("A Fistful of Paintballs") and the 2012 prize was tickets to a touring production of Chicago ("Curriculum Unavailable"). In 2015 the school's administration consultant Frankie Dart put a ban on all paintball contests on campus. This was due to the expensive costs of cleaning up the school after the games were over along with the numerous complaints from the custodial and janitorial departments ("Modern Espionage").

Campus Radio[]

Located inside Greendale Community College, KQZY 98.6 FM is the college's radio station. It appears "Albert" runs the station, it broadcasts on Tuesdays and Thursdays and, students can submit tapes to audition as a DJ. Neil is a DJ at the station.

People[]

Notable Faculty[]

Administrators
Department Heads
Teaching Staff
Support staff

Other[]

  • Guterman, teacher, unknown subject
  • Mrs. Plimpton, teacher, unknown subject, dead
  • Josh Laolagi, security guard

Notable Students[]

Trivia[]


Greendale posters[]

Links[]

External links[]

References[]


  1. The 5 As -"Episode One: "Accessibility"
  2. History was revealed in the episode "Basic Sandwich"
  3. History 101
  4. Interpretive Dance
  5. Basic Intergluteal Numismatics
  6. Introduction to Film
  7. Beginner Pottery
  8. Physical Education
  9. Conspiracy Theories and Interior Design
  10. Analysis of Cork-Based Networking
  11. History 101
  12. Anthropology 101
  13. Curriculum Unavailable
  14. Spanish 101
  15. Emotional Consequences of Broadcast Television
  16. Introduction to Finality
  17. History 101
  18. History 101
  19. Cooperative Polygraphy
  20. Introduction to Finality
  21. Introduction to Teaching
  22. Environmental Science
  23. Introduction to Finality
  24. Physical Education
  25. Economics of Marine Biology
  26. Geography of Global Conflict
  27. Digital Exploration of Interior Design
  28. Spanish 101
  29. Aerodynamics of Gender
  30. Environmental Science
  31. Introduction to Finality
  32. Curriculum Unavailable
  33. Spanish 101
  34. Biology 101
  35. Curriculum Unavailable
  36. Football, Feminism and You
  37. Basic Sandwich
  38. Repilot
  39. Introduction to Teaching
  40. Poster behind Abed in Advanced Documentary Filmmaking.
  41. Curriculum Unavailable
  42. Introduction to Teaching
  43. Mentioned by Jeff in Grifting 101.
  44. Contemporary American Poultry
  45. Social Psychology
  46. Digital Exploration of Interior Design
  47. Basic Rocket Science
  48. Featured in "Debate 109".
  49. Featured in "Physical Education".
  50. Poster in gym in "Economics of Marine Biology".
  51. Featured in "Football, Feminism and You".
  52. Poster on hallway wall as Abed jumps over Jeff in "Modern Warfare".
  53. Poster by judging table in "Advanced Criminal Law".
  54. Poster on hallway wall behind Britta and Jeff in "The Science of Illusion".
  55. Featured in the Pilot.
  56. Mentioned in "Basic Intergluteal Numismatics".
  57. A flyer seen in "Ladders" as Abed straightening a clock.
  58. Featured in "Modern Warfare".
  59. First seen in "Investigative Journalism".
  60. Featured in "Modern Espionage".
  61. Featured in "Modern Espionage".
  62. A flyer seen in "Geography of Global Conflict" as Annie sees Annie Kim's Model UN Flyer.
  63. Featured in "Debate 109".
  64. Featured in "Economics of Marine Biology".
  65. A flyer seen in "Geography of Global Conflict" as Annie sees Annie Kim's Model UN Flyer.
  66. A flyer seen in "Geography of Global Conflict" as Annie sees Annie Kim's Model UN Flyer.
  67. Mentioned by Annie at the start of "Conspiracy Theories and Interior Design".
  68. A poster seen in the end tag of "Mixology Certification".
  69. Featured in "Paradigms of Human Memory" and "Regional Holiday Music".
  70. Mentioned by Jeff in "Accounting for Lawyers".
  71. A flyer seen in "Beginner Pottery" in the study room.
  72. A flyer seen in "Geography of Global Conflict" as Annie sees Annie Kim's Model UN Flyer.
  73. A poster seen in "Bondage and Beta Male Sexuality" indicates they were 5th place in the State in 2010.
  74. Featured in "A Fistful of Paintballs".
  75. Featured in "Geography of Global Conflict".
  76. Featured in "Bondage and Beta Male Sexuality".
  77. A flyer seen in "Social Psychology" in the room Ian Duncan is conducting the experiment in.
  78. A flyer seen in the end tag of "Applied Anthropology and Culinary Arts".
  79. A flyer seen by the bathroom in "Fort Hawthorne" in "A Fistful of Paintballs".
  80. Featured in "Investigative Journalism".
  81. A poster seen in "Anthropology 101" as Pierce and Troy are walking in the quad.
  82. Flyer seen in "Basic Story".

Locations
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